Today I got hit on twice at the bar! What the hell! I've never ever been hit on before. I mean where someone comes up to you out of the blue and the sexwooing attempts begin. One time it was some fat drunk guy and the next time it was a pair of guys offering to play cards with me and Karen. Who knows, maybe having a lesbian with you is a good luck charm. I'm not all aquiver with delight or something, I'm just befuddled (~52% pleasantly). I wasn't even wearing nice clothes or anything! Hmm, the only variable that actually changed was that I plucked my eyebrows (on a whim while stoned). MAYBE SEVENTEEN MAGAZINE WAS TELLING TRUTHS ALL ALONG. I think it'd be odd for a guy to see what the fuck is in those magazines. "They tell you how to pluck your eyebrows with a diagram with angles?!" Oh you ought to see how many cosmetic products pertain only to eyebrows. And this is coming from a person who never wears makeup or even blows dry her hair. (Shit, which sounds worse, blows dry or blow-dries?) Can you imagine how much brain power the average middle class American girl spends fussing over her appearance? I mean hey, maybe I'm less attractive and less accessible because I don't give a shit, but christ, I'm okay with that tradeoff. Anyway this became a good-natured tirade, but all I meant to mention was the hitting on. A first! And don't you dare mock me because it was totally undesirable. It's just kooky! Oh also I forgot, I lied and told the first guy I wasn't single. He just up and asked, and I remembered how my prior honesty had bought me an extra five acutely uncomfortable minutes of being cajoled by the middle-aged black man in the record store in St. Louis, so I just lied and said no. He left pretty promptly. The fat guy, not the black guy who wanted my number despite me being from a different city.

It's so weird! This feeling of possible desirability. Kind of like... eating a taffy apple when you are a kid and have a loose tooth. A new feeling, and kind of like you're maybe doing something wrong, but suck it up kid, really when that tooth is out you can justify it, it's not a grown-up tooth after all.